saying no

when i was a bit younger, i find it very difficult to say NO to anything. it's not that i agree with everything but what i feel during those times is that everything's just ok with me. i like making people happy. a pleaser one might say. but that's just me..probably not knowing or just not realizing what's my own preference on things because as i've said, i am a new soul.

as i've come of age, i learn and establish, albeit slowly, what my wants are. what i feel like doing, eating, feeling and what i really want to be. i realized that social interaction is not just about going with the flow and pleasing everyone around me, it's also about knowing what i want and at the same time taking into consideration what others want. in short, compromise.

now, i can easily say no and be firm on my decision especially when i have a valid reason for doing so. i have no regrets of choosing to stay home tonight because that's what i want to do. though it could have been better if i am spending the moment with my b, i would still prefer this rather than pretending to enjoy singing in front of a tv screen.

i'm glad that i did it. glad that no amount of persuasion or guilty feeling was able to change my mind.