the pressure is on

when you're in your late twenties and single, people constantly ask when you'll get married. when you get married, people constantly ask when you'll have a baby. when you have a baby, people constantly ask when you'll have another baby.

i got married at 30. even though the husband and i have been together for more than 10 years, we still feel that we need to spend our first years of marriage just the two of us. there's no plan of having a baby just yet so we're always in control (if you know what i mean). we are both so happy at this point in our lives that we don't feel the need to make a family soon. we're on our way to celebrating our 3rd year in a few months and people are into this notion that we can't conceive. i honestly hate it when they make assumptions on our life, criticizing our way of living and advising us on things we should do to be blessed with a kid. and when we explain that we really don't want to have one yet, they judge and criticize some more.

i don't know if it's also like this in other cultures but all i know is that i despise this kind of disposition. i don't go around giving unsolicited advice so i hope people will do the same and stick their noses out of other people's business. we each have a life to live so let people do what they want to do with their own as long as they're not hurting anyone. if they decided not to have a child at this time yet or never ever, respect their choices and move on.

we're under a lot of pressure right now to conceive. up until late last year, there's still no longing for a little one. we have our reasons, yes, but the yearning just isn't there yet. last month, i decided to give it a try this january. as the days lead to the peak of my ovulation, the ailments that have been bugging me in the past are making their presence felt so we need to postpone. to be honest, i just decided to give it a go because i wanted people to stop bothering us. but as the song goes - "life has a funny way of sneaking up on you", it must've sensed that i still wasn't ready.